Since we'll be south of the equator tomorrow, I was going to do a test to see if toilets really do flush clockwise on one side of the equator and counter on the other (the official word on why they do that is that they don't). Unfortunately, the water in our toilet here just kind of goes down. I'll file a breathless report from Bali because I know you are all curious.

Today's SARS looniness:

Hong Kong is taking the temperature of all departing visitors.

Amazingly, scientists have already sequenced the genome. This should hopefully lead to a SARS test, very soon, which will help to quarantine people before they start coughing on everyone. Go, Western medicine!

And in a gross overreaction, our apartment complex has closed our swimming pool, conference room, and weight room until further notice.

You know what's really insidious about this SARS thing? The symptoms play on your imagination. Let me explain.

One of the main symptoms is a dry cough.

Think, dry cough. Drrryyyyy cooouuughhhh.

If you're not already coughing, you're probably at least feeling a tickle in the back of your throat. With just a soupçon of mental effort, it's not hard to imagine shortness of breath, neck pain, or a fever...

Last minute scare. It turns out that as of this week, Indonesia wants a visa. Even our travel agent didn't know. They issue it at the airport, but I don't know WHAT would've happened if we had shown up without the required passport photos. I thought we were going to have to scramble out this evening to take some sweaty photos taken, but we managed to scrape some up. It's still going to cost us an extra US$100, which is a stinker. Good plan, Indonesia, for reviving your lagging tourist industry.

Pouty. Boo hoo, no Borneo. We decided that there's too much there to see in four days. Even just the Malaysian part of Borneo is bigger than all of the other part of Malaysia that we're attached to. And the Mulu cave area that I wanted to see is a long haul from the city where you can initially fly into. So we're having to "settle" for Bali. This will be Marjorie's first time south of the equator. We're staying right near where the discotheque bombing was a little while back, but other than that, we're not the kind to hang out in the heavily touristed areas.

I've been playing around with The Gimp (the open source answer to Photoshop), which is why the blog title is now all dj jazzy jeff. Woop. I saved it in a graphics format (PNG) that's not compatible with all browsers, yet, so let me know if the title doesn't appear for you.

As far as work permits go, Marjorie is now officially 2 Legit 2 Quit. I'm still waiting on mine. I'm not even a slacker dependent yet; I'm just a wannabe slacker dependent.

Malaysia is our target destination next week for Marjorie's spring break. We were thinking of going back to Tioman, but figured, we can always go there on a weekend; why not do something a little further away while we have the time? So now we're thinking Borneo. It looks, just, incredible. If for some reason it doesn't happen, I'm going to be awfully pouty.

For convoluted reasons my employment pass here is delayed, and officially I'm working for a Hong Kong company. Marjorie's pass is going to come through now, so I'm signing on as a dependent.

Filling out the form to become a dependent, I notice it has the following options:

Wife
Child

Which am I, again?

Marjorie doesn't have SARS. I thought I'd mention that point, before mentioning that she has a slight fever. SARS starts with a high fever and several other symptoms she doesn't have. She went to the doctor today, who prescribed some antibiotics; in fact, to take off work in this town, you pretty much have to have a doctor's note. What stinks is that I can't buy a thermometer for her anywhere, because spooked Singaporeans have bought up the whole stock. I've been seeing more and more people wearing surgical face masks, which are pretty much useless, except for keeping you from spreading it if you already have it.

So I'm trying to decide whether there's anything to this SARS thing to be afraid of, or is it just hype? I think the answer is, it's something to watch out for. It probably wouldn't kill us if we caught it, but it does have a mortality rate much higher than your typical influenza. SARS doesn't have as high a mortality rate as the West Nile virus we had back in Atlanta; it just spreads a lot faster. It's far more dangerous to the young and old, but it has killed some people who were in their prime. So we're being careful. I thought they had it under control, but some new cases sprung up today, both here and in Hong Kong.

There's an text message making the rounds on people's cell phones:

Nobody cares if I live or die, but everyone cares if I cough.

Took a quick jaunt up the road to the MacRitchie Reservoir for some nature spotting today. It's a fine, fine place to visit, with nicely groomed walking trails, a boardwalk around the water, and some nature trails. There were few birds to be seen, but the calls were could occasionally hear were not the usualy calls we hear around our section of town. As we walked along we came across a pack of twenty or so long-tailed macaques! They were all a little too tame; only just a little bit leery of us. There was one large male, obviously the alpha, who wasn't frightened at all, even when a jogger went by. Several of the babies weren't too afraid either.

We took the long way back on the bus, and ended up passing this humongous Buddhist complex, which we're definitely going to have to check out later on...

Old jokes. I'm on an email general discussion list with a guy who works for a university translating Latin texts. He just posted these jokes, which were written down in A.D. 400 (though they might be older than that). And I thought my grandfather told some old jokes!

A student who wanted to teach his ass not to chew on things stopped giving him food. When the ass died from hunger, he said: "What a disaster! Just when I had taught him not to chew, he goes and dies on me."

A friend asked a student who was travelling overseas: "Could you please buy me two slaves, each fifteen years old." He replied: " If I can't find what you want, I'll buy you one who is thirty."

A couple of good-for-nothing students were complaining to one another that their fathers were still alive. One said: "How about we each kill our father?" "No way," said the other. "That would make us parricides. But if you like, I'll kill yours and you can kill mine."

A fellow ran into a student and said to him: "The slave you sold me has died." "By the gods," he replied, " he never did anything like that when he was with me."

A student was on a voyage and a storm sprung up. When his servants started wailing, he said: "Don't wail. I've left you all your liberty in my will."

A student invited to a meal didn't eat. When one of the guests asked him why he wasn't eating, he replied: "In case I appear to have come for the food."

A student writing to his father from Athens, thoroughly proud of what he had learnt, added: "I hope I will find you charged in a capital case, so I can show you my skill as a lawyer."

Sudden acute respiratory silliness. Marjorie reports seeing people on the MRT (subway) with surgical masks. I haven't noticed any yet, but my head is usually in a book.

The guy who scooped my ice cream today, though, was wearing one. They also had a sign up, talking about the anti-bacterial cleansing agent they're using in defense of SARS. Which would be really helpful if SARS was a bacteria.

We could still visit Thailand now if we wanted, like we did a few weeks back, but because we're from Singapore, we'd have to wear a mask the entire time. Imagine the tan lines.

My soccer coach sent out an email, saying that anyone who shows symptoms at this Sunday's game will be sent home. He is also temporarily suspending the
communal jug of Tang we use for hydration.

Hong Kong just sent out text messages to six million cell phone users, trying to quash a rumor that they've been declared an "infected" city.

Let's just infect everybody now, and be done with it.

Great quote I just read from late physicist Richard Feynman:

Einstein was a giant.

His head was in the clouds, but his feet were on the ground.

Those of us who are not so tall have to choose!

We watched part of the infamous Michael Jackson documentary tonight, which was finally on TV here. Yes, he's messed up in some ways. But I came away thinking what a nice guy he is, in general, and what a jerk the interviewer was. The way he tried to twist everything the wrong way was really offputting. I don't believe the accusations against MJ at all, and I'm not even a fan.

Found this postcard, which I had to buy because it's exactly the view I see when I walk out of my (work) building. Most afternoons, I can be found sitting along these walkways, having an ice cream. To the left, just off the picture, is a giant video screen that plays the same commercials in a loop, repeating every two minutes or so, for months on end. I have them all memorized.

Wacky. More wacky fruit spotted downstairs: Custard apples, pomelos, and Thai fragrant seed (which the internet seems to never have heard of).

Wacky person spotted downstairs: a karaoke busker.

More SARS wackiness: Considered going to see Moby tomorrow, but turns out he cancelled due to SARS. We apparently caught the Stones just in time; they cancelled the rest of their shows out here. Today I was handed a flyer for an "Aroma Bio-technology air management product" that has a picture of two little kids playing, and says: "What chance do they have if airborne bacteria hit them?" Vultures.

Watched a bit of the local news tonight, for the latest SARS update; I think they're getting on top of it, despite a third death. And we're posting nurses at the airport. They have a little news ticker at the bottom of the screen -- I had to laugh at the blurb that popped up: "Car broken into at Sim Lim Square; laptop, palm pilot stolen". These are apparently the top two stories in town tonight.

Tonight we watched a very silly, but very funny VCD we bought in Thailand: Ali G Indahouse. A spoof of, I don't know, the British white hip-hop scene? Fear of a Black Hat meets Meet John Doe meets Spice World.

Kind of interesting. Some of the flyers that are being dropped onto Iraq.

Back from the Stones. Quite a show. We were a little too far away from the stage to get totally into it, but no complaints; they played a long and energetic show. At one point I tried to imagine they were some new band I was hearing for the first time; it was totally impossible! I mean, there's Keith! And Mick! And they're playing "Let It Bleed"!

Keith poked fun at Singapore at one point by bringing an ashtray up to the mike to put his cigarette ashes in, making a comment about having to keep things clean.

We got most of the big hits: Brown Sugar, Street Fighting Man, Honky Tonk Woman, Tumbling Dice, Sympathy For The Devil, Gimme Shelter, It's Only Rock and Roll, Satisfaction... Some new stuff, some unfamiliar stuff. Angie was a nice surprise. Jumping Jack Flash was the encore.

Crazy news rolling in, just as we're ready to head off to the Stones concert... Apparently Marjorie's school will be closed until April 6th because of this tropical disease SARS. She's on the phone trying to frantically call all her parents about it. There was a big school concert that all the students were supposed to be involved in tomorrow too. No reported cases, just a precautionary measure. I told you this country doesn't fuck around.

Some of the weird fruits you'll find downstairs at my favorite fruit store, the Sun Moon:

Buddha Fingers. Really strange looking. I was going to try this but it turns out they're all rind and no fruit, and so are only used for cooking and display.
Jambu. Like mini pears. Haven't tried yet.
Dragon Fruit. Very strange. Tried this in Vietnam and it tasted like kiwi fruit. Tried it back in Singapore and it didn't taste like anything at all.
Mangosteens. Haven't tried these yet.
Breadfruit. These don't look edible to me for some reason.
Jackfruit. Same with these.

They don't sell durians, unsurprisingly. These are the infamous delicacy that are widely banned from trains and hotels because they stink so bad. They have them in open air markets, and you immediately know it when you walk by a place that's selling them. (Marjorie and I have been known to call each other "durian ass".) I've tasted it before, back in Atlanta; an accurate description I heard was that they taste like orange custard soaking in toilet water.

740 people are now quarantined in their houses here in town due to exposure to SARS. The government here doesn't mess around. Let's hope nobody has to be put down.

Grocery store finds. We've recently bought "Pooh Biscuits" and "Collon Biscuits". They're both pretty good, actually.

Chickening out. We had an invite to go to the American Club last night. In a reverse of our traditional roles, Marjorie was all for it, but I vetoed the idea on cautionary grounds; the war had just started, and the American Club has been talked about as an obvious target here in town. Have the terrorists already won?

Hooray. The War to Encourage Terrorism has begun. Keep your head down everyone.

So where have we been the last few months? Singapore. Hanoi. Hong Kong. New York. Atlanta.

So where have they found this new killer virus, SARS? Singapore. Hanoi. Hong Kong. New York. Atlanta.

Are we "Typhoid Mark" and "Typhoid Marjorie"?

Today was fun. We set out, far too late, for Pulau Ubin, a little island wedged in the canal between Singapore and Malaysia, which is set aside as a recreation area. You get there via a ferry from Changi Village, but some apparent misremembering of the guidebook I checked beforehand led us down near the baggage area of the airport, where we were greeted by concertina wire and signs showing guards shooting trespassers. We tried to get on a bus out, but the bus only took us in, and a policeman came on board and interrogated us, and finally kicked us off. We found a bus back to Changi Village, and were ready to just hang it up and head home. We ended up spending a half hour watching the flock of long-tailed parakeets up in the trees. The ferry, we finally found, was just nearby, so we hopped on (only S$2) and made it out to Ubin. Rented a couple of bikes, and rode around basically looking at wildlife.

Back in Changi Village we had some questionable seafood; what I'm eating is the "prawns with oats", which prompted the question, "Do I eat this, or, did I eat this?"

A few photos from our trip to Ko Samui:

Customs at the Ko Samui airport.

Another scene from the Ko Samui airport.

The giant buddha.

A temple.

The airport bar on the way out.

View from the plane on the way out.

Interesting cultural tidbit. In Japanese, adding "yo" to the end of the sentence means "I assure you" -- it adds emphasis to the sentence. Just like in Detroit!

Everyone is back from the yearly snowboard trip, which I missed this year for the first time in six years. In previous years we hit

1998: Summit county, Colorado (Copper Mountain, Arapahoe Basin, Breckenridge...)

1999: Jackson Hole, Wyoming (side trip to Yellowstone)

2000: Summit county again, plus Vale

2001: Whistler/Blackcomb, by way of Vancouver (where I broke a bone in my hand on the second day)

2002: Lake Tahoe (a complete circuit)
Matt and I would try to outdo each other every year. This year he did a faceplant from twelve feet up on some blue ice and ended up splitting open his lip and bleeding from both nostrils. That would've been hard to outdo.

Damn, that's some fun stuff. I was on a beach in Thailand, and I still have regrets.

Back from Thailand. Not sure why we came back, but we're back.

Not a bad way to spend a weekend. The snorkel/kayak trip was fantastic, though the water was a little cloudy due to an algae bloom or something. Saw giant clams, crabs, sea cucumbers, parrotfish, and a puffer fish. We also spotted some birds that looked like snowy egrets, except that they were black; Marjorie didn't appreciate my suggestion that we call them "negrets". That night we had an amazing dinner at Samui Seafood; I had the hot and spicy white snapper, which was outstanding, and Marjorie had the sweet and sour red snapper, which was jaw-dropping.

The hotel for our package deal was fabulous (except for dozen or so mosquitos in our room when we first arrived -- and this is a malaria and dengue fever zone). We had Thai massages side-by-side out by the pool this morning, which was vera vera nice. It was pretty much the masseuses' whole body (hands, feet, elbows, knees) versus ours, and we never stood a chance.

Much relaxed, we went out for some last minute shopping. While we were loading up on DVDs of questionable origin, a drama was playing itself out across the street; a motorcycle-slash-street vendor cooking station caught fire. We could see flames licking at the gas tank and the cooker's propane tank, so we high-tailed it out of there. Luckily they were able to extinguish it without much fanfare.

Favorite restaurant name spotted on Ko Samui: Cow Pat Poo.

Greetings from Thailand! We've been on Ko Samui island for a day now. Today we snorkeled a bit, then rented a motorbike and did a trip around the whole island, which took most of the day. Stopped at waterfalls, scenic views, temples, and a giant Buddha -- in fact, we stopped right where these folk did. Tomorrow we take a boat out to the national marine park where The Beach was filmed, for snorkeling and sea kayaking.

News McNuggets.

I'm in better shape than I've been in ten years or so.

I wrote my first check yesterday, and deposited my first one today. They do it all weird here. You have to draw slashes up in the corner for some reason, and some other strange rules.

I've gotten used to spelling my last name with a "zed" instead of a "zee".

I visited the American Club for the first time last night (Marjorie's second visit). They have guys with machine guns out front. I don't think I want to hang out there too much.

The first business trip for me is shaping up to be Tasmania. We saw a documentary on it the other day, and it looks really awesome.

Saw "Catch Me If You Can" the other day. Good mindless entertainment. It's Spielberg, so I guess that was to be expected.

Sorry for the lack of updates. Not much new, other than Marjorie starting her new job (which seems to be going pretty good, but I'll let her tell you). Oh, and I picked up our tickets for Ko Samui today. Woop!

I've noticed one very backward thing about this country. It seems the civil servants, especially at the post office, are enthusiastic and committed at their jobs, often bending over backwards to serve you. You have to look to the private sector to encounter laziness and bad attitudes, for the most part. There are of course exceptions, but it seems to be a general rule. This is in direct contrast to America -- I'm reminded of the Simpsons quote, where Patty and Selma describe their job at the Department of Motor Vehicles: (Patty) "Some days, we don't let the line move AT ALL." (Selma) "Yeah, we call those WEEKdays!"

Another interesting cultural tidbit: when a Chinese person is, say, pouring your tea, the way to thank them is to tap the table lightly with your middle finger. The story about how this tradition got started is that the Chinese emperor went undercover for something, and his henchmen couldn't kowtow to him without blowing his cover, so they started doing that.

Another tidbit: the Chinese alphabet symbol for America is the combination of the symbols for "beautiful" and "country". That's what they tell me, anyway; it could be saying "infidel pigs" for all I know. Many Chinese were apparently told as children that there was gold just lying around everywhere you look in the US, hence "beautiful country".

Japanese lessons are going slow but steady. I'm taking the class with my cow orker, and we've been going out after class for "Japanese practice" at a small out-of-the-way Japanese-style bar where he knows the Japanese bartender, who gives us tips. The fact that she makes the best martinis in town is a nice bonus.

Required reading from the New York Times. (Registration is required, unfortunately, but the NYT is worth registering for. It's free.)

Marjorie finally got her bon-bon-eatin' ass off the couch and found a job. Actually, it looks like I'm going to be her dependent, because they're rushing an employment pass through for her. She'll be working at an international school very near our house; they had her in for a few days volunteering this week, and almost immediately offered her a class -- starting next Monday! She's going to have three kids from Japan, one from Korea, one from Norway, and one from the US. Two or three of them speaka no Engrish -- that should be interesting.

I too have a contract now to look over and sign. Our uncertain situation is gradually getting resolved, thankfully. I have been very, very busy at work; we have to scrape together a demo in a very short period of time; I'm polishing up my tap shoes for certain parts of it.

Mr. Rogers is dead. Some of my earliest memories were of watching his show. While it wasn't my absolute favorite as a kid, as I grew older I grew to realize what a class act this man was. It's a sad, sad day in the neighborhood.

Now we're talking. We're booked to visit Koh Samui in a few weeks. This is a short boat ride from where The Beach was filmed. Our package includes Thai massages.

On an unrelated note, it's 46 degrees back in Atlanta right now.

Fun in the sun. We ferried off to Kusu and St. John's Islands today, basically just to frolick. Lots of good nature spotting. Some birds we had never seen, like the Collared Kingfisher, the Magpie Robin, and what I think was a Brahminy Kite. The highlight of the day were the mudskippers; they're frequently the stars of nature videos we see, as an example of evolution in action. It's cool to see things that you knew existed, but you always thought existed somewhere else. Like last year when we went to Tioman Island and saw flying fish, monitor lizards, and giant clams.

Very fun. Last night we hooked up with friends of our friend Dean who live in town. Ended up at a karaoke bar -- the "Woody Green"? -- where our group were the only "ang mo", but these people were regulars there. The rule was, when the wrong lyrics appeared on the monitor for the song you're singing (which was often), you had to sing them. We did room-clearing versions of "You're So Vain", "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction", and "Oh, Darling". A very fun bunch of folks. Dean, Rob says to tell you that you're a "pooftah".

Marjorie got us tickets to see the Rolling Stones here in March. Woop!

I figured out today that my phone number here is "93-SEXILY".

Baby Gecko In Da House! Apparently they can make they 17 floor climb. This guy's quick too. I spotted him/her on the floor and it promptly ran under a cd case, but when I lifted the case the little fellow was nowhere to be found. Oh well. Hopefully he'll eat all the little black bugs I've seen flying in the house lately...I think these came in due to our orange plant. The orange plant is gone, yet they remain, but hopefully not for long now that Lizard is on the job.

Not much to report today. Marjorie went off to a movie tonight, giving me a chance for some quality time with my guitar. We've resolved to run off to a beach somewhere, Real Soon Now, as exploring's what we really came here for. Just finding the right time to go is the issue, with my work.

Hopeful: I woke up this morning with no real job prospects, but, lucky me, I got a call around 10am asking if I could come in for an interview. Yea! I'm not going to jinx it by talking about specifics, but the interview went well. Money was discussed, which is a very good sign. And it was more money then I expected, which is GREAT!!!! So wish me luck. I'll let you know more as soon as I know.

Yuck. I've gone off before about the ridiculously-named Speak Good English movement here. Recently I've decided that what they really need is a Stop Picking Your Nose In Public movement. Seriously, it's disgusting. I spot people on the buses and trains all the time, in practically up to their wrist, without an iota of self conciousness. Their ears too. It's obviously just a different set of standards for acceptable societal behavior, but -- eesh.

Konichiwa! With only a few hours advance notice, I found myself sitting in a three hour Japanese class tonight. It was the very first class, and it's "total immersion" -- meaning, not a word of English was spoken by the sensei (teacher). To overuse a metaphor, I was drinking from the firehose... The coworker I'm taking it with and I are both of the opinion that a little English up front might be helpful, but then again, my French teacher in high school did the same thing, and I still remember a lot of the language.

A rainy Sunday. Soccer later will be soggy at best.

The worldwide war protests yesterday had a decidedly different flavor over here. Word was spread via cell phone SMS messaging, but only five or six people showed up to protest at the US embassy. They were "discouraged" from doing so, as they didn't have a permit. In fact, they were taken down to the station for questioning as to the source of the cell phone messages, but not charged (yet). Read all about it.

Wonder how they would have reacted to a US citizen with a placard? The words "next plane out" come to mind.

Here you go Matt: This is something you're not likely to see in the States: While walking through little India today, Mark and I spotted t-shirts with Osama bin Laden's likeness on them with "Attack on America" written. Nice.

Taken for a ride. Trying to go out to dinner last night, we told the cab driver to take us to Robertson Quay. "Robinson...?" It was like he never heard of it. And this is not that obscure of a place. We should have jumped out right then. But he acts like he knows where he's going so we don't press it. After ten minutes or so, though, even I know enough of the layout here to see that he's not going the right way at all. I ask if he really knows where it is, and he pulls up and says, "Yes yes, here we are, Robinson Drive." Nowhere near. He offered to try again, but we figure our chances are better with some other cab driver who might have a clue. We gruffly pay him off; he may have been conning us, but he did at least give me back more change than he should've.

It takes us at least a half an hour to hail another cab, during which time I realize that my cell phone has gone missing. It apparently fell out in the first cab. Yay. A report has been filed, but I don't hold out a lot of hope.

Anyway, at least I have today off to spend with my sweetness.

Ever feel like you have a theme song for a particular experience? This Soul Coughing song seems to rattle around my head a lot in Singapore:

White Girl,
Market at Van Ness,
Heels to drag,
Discombobulated.
Air all soft around,
Hear the man singing,
Inclines and wires,
Telegraph Avenue.
Look away and she's eastbound, out of sight.
Dropped here,
By the hand of the Astronaut,
Builder of the pyramids,
The man from outer space.
Innocent farmgirl,
Raised by the aliens,
Out in Northridge,
Out in the larger world.
Look away and she's eastbound, out of sight.
WHITE GIRL! WHITE GIRL! WHITE GIRL! WHITE GIRL, WHITE GIRL, WHITE GIRL.

Trust me to open my mouth... Okay kids, I need to apologize for the previous blog, nobody's trying to "prohibit a flag" what's really happening is the State legislature in Virginia are considering passing a bill proposing to DISPLAY (note, not prohibit) the South Vietnamese flag at "official" events where other countries flags are flown. This IS pissing off the Vietnamese government, and maybe rightfully so, but it's not the issue I was upset about.
This is the kind of thing that happens when you don't research your sources and you blog when you've had beer. Oh well.

Now this is disturbing: According to today's Straits Times (the English newspaper in S'pore) "Vietnam angered by flag ban in Virginia"...apparently Virginia has passed a bill prohibiting the flying of the Vienamese flad during public ceremonies....WHAT?!!!!! Is this not the United States where freedom of speech and expression are guarenteed rights? If this law is really in effect it really shouldn't be. I believe it would be rather unconstitutional. These kinds of policies really piss off our friends abroad, and I fear most Americans, including myself are probably totally ignorant of their goings on.
On a positive note, there was a pro-American peace rally in South Korea yesterday. My parents told me the only news they saw in the States from Korea was of the anti-american nature (and they watch a lot of news). So far, all I've seen reported in the Straights time are pro-American stories such as the latter. The truth probably lies somewhere between.

Valentine's Day approaches, and it has a decidedly different flavor this year. Not just because we're abroad, or married. We also share a bank account. In previous years, even if I didn't pick Just The Right Gift, at least I could fall back on saying I care by spending a lot of money. Now, I'm just spending her money, and she's spending mine, so no substituting "pricy" for "thoughtful" like a big dumb male.

Of course, Marjorie's already bought herself a nice robe, which she says can be my Valentine's gift to her, but I'm not THAT stupid.

I have the day off, so hopefully we can get away somewhere nice; maybe Pulau Ubin.

Football match #2, today, and all the jogging paid off. I'm still not a great player but I'm improving and having more fun. The second half was played in pretty much a torrential downpour, the kind where the ball just decides to stop at random points when it hits a puddle. I "took one for the team", diving for a clearing header where I ended up lying in a mudpuddle. Almost made up for the stupid accidental handball in the first half -- I got the only yellow card of the day. It's a stupid instinct, but hard to overcome when you haven't been playing, to stick your hand out when the ball is going by you. Luckily, not in the penalty area.

Afterwards, Holland Village for dinner. We found the place there that rents DVDs; there are only one or two in town (everyone just buys them, it seems). Turns out this place has a branch right near our house.

The job hunt has begun in earnest for me now, and it appears that my prospects are good. Singapore, like seemingly everywhere else in the world, needs teachers. The only real dilemma is should I look for a full-time position? I'd like to be able to go with Mark on possible business trips (there is already talk of Hong Kong, Japan, and Tasmania), and truthfully, I really wasn't happy teaching the two years I did it. But, a large part of me wants a full time position, it's just got to be the right one. Luckily, Singapore does appear to have a few early intervention programs so maybe I'd be able to continue to work where my heart is....with the babes and toddlers.

I've upped my productivity. Up yours! There've been less postings lately because I've set up a separate login on my computer dedicated entirely to Work. Less distractions, like links to the blog, mean higher productivity and greater job satisfaction. I've been producing mountains of code lately. I highly recommend this approach. Working with an internet connection at the ready is like when you used to try to do homework sitting by the window where you could look out into the street and see kids playing.

The winners of the 16th annual International Obfuscated C Code Competition have been posted. This is the highly geeky contest that I've won five times in past years (once in collaboration with a friend). The object is to write the most bizarre but still functional computer program in C.

I submitted no entries this year, but I have an entry almost ready for next year's contest that I'm pretty confident will win.

I also have the idea for a Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest submission, but I need to work the words out just right. The object of this contest is to write the worst opening line of a novel. It's named in honor of the author who started his book with the line "It was a dark and stormy night".

We had an enjoyable evening. We went across the street to the Newton Circus Hawker Center (a hawker center is a food court with vendors selling local fare), and purchased four dinners. Not because we were starving, but the first three weren't that great, and at $3.50 Singapore dollars a plate we figured why settle for mediocre. On the fourth try we hit the jackpot: Mark ordered tiger prawns with chili sauce, and the sauce was soooo good I ended up ordering a small plate of rice to go with them and just poured some of his sauce on it as my dinner. YUM! After dinner we stumbled upon a dancing dragon. It's Chinese New Year so the Dragon puppets that go unanimated most of the year (except practice) and their peeps get the chance to do their thang.

We just watched our first DVD (L.A. Story). We're hip with the 90's! Woo!

Today was like the day after Thanksgiving back in the states; nobody was working because of Chinese New Year's, so everyone was out shopping. So Marjorie tells me, at any rate; I had to work, and from home, which I hate.

We still occasionally have exchanges where one of us will suddenly say, "We live in Singapore!", and the other responds, "I know, weird, isn't it?"

Here's where the space program should go from here, IMHO. As Marjorie pointed out, I used to work at Kennedy Space Center, and have more than a passing interest in the subject, but only enough knowledge to be dangerous.

1. Investigation of Jupiter's moon Europa. Widely cited by scientists as having the best chance of sustaining life in the solar system besides Earth. Under all its ice there's believed to be an ocean warmed by thermal activity. Exploring it will pose some interesting technical challenges. If we were to find life there, it would eclipse all the combined scientific achievements of the space program up to this point. And we would have to come to the conclusion that, if life could spring up separately twice in the same solar system, it must be ubiquitous throughout the galaxy.

2. Investigation of other potential life-sustaining moons, such as Callisto, and, I think, Ganymede?

3. A comet landing. Comets have played a crucial role in the evolution of our solar system, possibly even seeding our planet with the necessary raw materials for life, and have also been the likely cause of ecological disasters.

4. An asteroid landing. Probably the best scientific bang-for-your-buck.

5. Exploration of the outer planets. This is our best picture of Pluto and its moon.

All of these should be unmanned. Not that this is cowardice in the face of disaster, but because man in space hasn't been a good idea for a long time. Launching humans is just an expensive conceit. I don't know, maybe it's necessary to keep public interest and therefore public funding, but to me that just says that public opinion needs to change...

It is both unbelievable to see, and not at all surprising. The shuttle fleet has been aging. I had still been holding my breath with every launch, and breathing a sigh of relief when I heard that a launch went off successfully. That's where it's surprising; the launches are soooo much more dangerous than the reentries, what with the shuttle sitting on thousands of pounds of explosives. Still, I knew deep down that another disaster would occur, some day.

Future of the program? The shuttle, I think, has always been pretty much a boondoggle, and claims of the scientific worth of the missions have been greatly exaggerated. I've always been more in favor of unmanned missions. There's so much still to explore in the solar system, and it's just not possible to take men anywhere beyond the moon. Costs of manned space travel are prohibitive, both in human terms, as we saw today, and monetary terms. Still, having a shuttle program was better than having no space program at all. This should pretty much put a wrap on this version of the shuttle program. I'll be surprised if there's any more launches, except maybe to retrieve the guys in the space station. Jeez, what's going to happen to that thing? I have no doubt that a new manned program will be planned out and approved as a result of this. The people like the manned missions. It'll probably just new model shuttles; I don't know what else they could do. It'll be two or three years at least before anything new could be launched.

I hope they had a quick death. BBC is reporting that their fate is unknown -- but they're dead, no question. It's just so... sad.

We just found out about the Space Shuttle Columbia. It's so sad. We're both utterly depressed. I'm sure Mark will have more to say about this as he used to work at the Space Center, and eye-witnessed the Space Shuttle Challenger tragedy.
Really, so sad. I hope this doesn't provide an excuse for the government to end or reduce funding for the space program.

I have a knack for reading books that, unbeknownst to me, are about to be turned into movies, or have just been turned into movies. In the past few years it happened with Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas and The Quiet American. More obscurely, it happened with A Beautiful Mind, which I somehow didn't hate after first seeing, but have since decided it a big stinker. I strongly encourage reading the book; the movie left out so much about the fascinating character of John Nash that you'd hardly recognize him.

Now they're making a movie treatment Master and Commander, a rather obscure book I've just about finished. Unfortunately, it stars the same crew as played in A Beautiful Mind: the annoying Russell Crowe, and the annoying Paul Bettany. On the other hand, it's directed by Peter Weir, who did one of my favorite movies, Fearless. I'm still inclined to think it will suck.

What possesses me to use big showy words like "triumvirate" and "unbeknownst" when I write? I don't talk that way. Rather ostentatious of me. Oops, there I go again.

HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR!! Today is the first day of the Year of The Goat. So far Mark and I have not participated in any of the festivities, but today we might have more luck. Luckily, the New Year is celebrated over a series of days, so we have multiple opportunities to get involved. This very nice Singaporean gentleman I met on the plane ride home told me that Lunar New Year is similar to the American Thanksgiving in that it's an occasion when people generally spend time with their families and visit their extended families, and not so similar to the Western New Year's Eve. So, unfortunately there may be fewer activities to view then I initially thought, but I'm sure there are still plenty of things going on around town to celebrate the occasion.
Have I mentioned how much I like Singaporean's yet? The guy I met on the plane was so nice, and generally the people we encounter on the streets are really charming as well. Singapore is a very friendly country. Perhaps because there is so little crime, people aren't as guarded as they are at home.
I'm up at 5:00am again today. Gotta love jet lag! There are some perks to it though, as I'm not generally a morning person, it gives me a chance to view the world at a time when I'm normally unconscious. I predict I'll get over this bout pretty easily though as I never fully acclimated to the time change when I went back to the States.

I'm Here! Sorry I haven't written lately. I've had an awful lot on my mind the last few days. I'm glad to be back in Singapore, and very grateful to be off the plane. I wish the weather today was a little better though. It's been raining all day, which has prevented us from going out and participating in any New Year's activities. But we did get to do something new today, we ordered home delivered beer from a local microbrew (Brewerks). Can't do that in Georgia.

Yay, Marjorie's home! 'Bout time, too, as the dishes were really starting to pile up. I kid.

It's one in the afternoon, and she's fast asleep. No surprise there. If the rain lets up, we're going to maybe hit the Hong Bao tonight.

Things Marjorie brought from home:

A triumvirate of my favorite candies: Sour Patch Kids, Swedish Fish, and Haribo Gummi Bears. The only real gummi bears are hard gummi bears. Only heathens eat the soft variety.

DVDs: Rushmore, Bottle Rocket, Pulp Fiction, for our as-yet nonexistent DVD player. I've actually never seen Bottle Rocket, it just came as part of a deal with Rushmore.

Most of our wedding dishes and flatware, and my favorite bowls.

Two packets Shake and Bake chicken recipe.

Two big fluffy towels.

Various other clothes and knickknacks.

My guitar tuner.

Coffee table coasters, and a shower curtain, designed to hold photographs.

My X-Arcade Joystick. Not! I forgot to remind her. That's her story, at any rate.

Sorry about the lack of updates. I've just been passing time in this training class all week. I'm ready for Marjorie to be home. She's ready to come home. She's not ready for the long flight. Like, REALLY not ready for it. Be strong, my cherub.

Sign spotted in the bus today:

Fly Thai Air to Thailand.

So many things to see, you'll want to come back.

I guess when you're Thailand, you don't have to work that hard on your slogans.

I'm not the worst player on the team, I think, and for that I'm thankful. I had a bear of a time finding cleats (er, boots) that fit me today. I went to a mall that at least a dozen stores that sold them, and there were TWO pairs that fit me in the whole place. I gots big feets by American standards, huge by Asian standards.

Anyway, we had at least ten extra players show up, so I didn't even think I was going to play. And the weather was a balmy eight thousand degrees. I told myself I wasn't going to try to volley the ball out of the air today, because that's the easiest way to make yourself look really stupid if you're out of practice. But during warmup I cranked a booming volley perfectly into the side of the net, that I think the coach saw, so I got some play time in. I was nothing too spectacular on the field (er, pitch), but there were no major miscues. Because of Chinese New Year, I have two weeks to get in shape for the next game, which should help.

I scuffed both knees up pretty good, and an ankle, but not too major. The kind of injury your mom used to spray Bactine on, that only causes you a lot of pain when you get in the shower and the water trickles down onto them... Ouchy. So I decided to jump in the pool instead. I stick both legs in, and it stings. I start to swim, and start shivering, thinking "Man, this water must be cold..." Then I remember.

I am Mr. Shocks Aplenty. For some reason, I go into shock at the drop of a hat. Shivering, jaw clenching, goose bumps, spasms... Even for extremely minor injuries like scraping your knee, twisted ankles... probably even paper cuts. It usually happens at night, just as I settle into bed. The worst time was when I dreamt I was in a car accident, and woke up in shock.

I decide that maybe the pool isn't the best place for this to happen, so I get out, thinking that I'm probably the only person in this tropical city who's shivering right now. It'll probably happen again tonight, as I said, when I go to bed. I've mentioned this to doctors, but none have ever heard of this... condition, or whatever you'd call it. It's not a big deal, just annoying.

Tomorrow, and for the next four days, I have a training class. Joy! (That's sarcasm.) I never want to be trained, I just want to have training.

A fun Saturday, spent -- working. Ah well. Suede concert is in an hour. But first, a quick jog.

CONCERT WRAP-UP: A good show. They were energetic, and "on". The venue was fabulous; outdoors on a breezy night, with just a few clouds, some stars peeking through, and some skyscrapers as a backdrop. It's a lot easier to see over the heads of a Singaporean crowd than an American one. The crowd of 5000 or so was, I'd say, about one third Westerners. I even saw my second black person since I've been in Singapore (sadly, I did not have a camera). Everyone was into the show; I half expected people to be there out of curiousity, but they cheered in recognition at the beginning of most every song, and sang along to much of it. (It's seems there's a much hipper indie music scene here than I expected. We really must find out where they all hang out.) I myself was only familiar with one album, Coming Up, which was featured often in the set list (though sadly, not my favorite tune, She). Their best tune was one that I wasn't familiar with, but loved immediately: "She's In Fashion".

It was weird to see the crowd unified, like they never are in the US, in hand clapping, arm swaying, or singing, at the beckoning of frontman Brett Anderson. He finished by telling the crowd that Singapore was one of the few places in the world where he'd consider living.

They had the standard concert snacks, just like back stateside: kotong balls, otoh sticks, curry puffs... I kid. Strange food, but otherwise, for the most part, a very Western-like concert experience...

Apparently Bob, owner of Rocky's, had terminal cancer. This is the most recent information I've heard. I feel so bad for his kids. Regina and Rudi (who is quoted in the article) were really nice kids when I knew them, in spite of the fact that both their parents were crazy, and they'd seen way too much. Regina has a baby now. Last time I saw her she was so grown up and Bob was talking about taking better care of himself because he was a grandfather now. Funny how time flies. I remember taking Regina to the Womad concerts when she was around 12 and chatting with Rudi when he'd visit the restaurant. Both kids were really sweet, hope they still are. They've been through so much. There's a memorial service at the restaurant tomorrow for Bob. I may go.

A better run tonight, about 3K without stopping. Jogged down to a local park looking for a place to kick a ball around. No dice; just a trail around a lake. I will try again tomorow. In the other direction there's a school for the "Spastic Children's Association". No political correctness here, it seems. Maybe they have a soccer field, but I'm afraid I'll be harrassed by a bunch of spastic kids.

When I got back I made it running up a full 13 floors this time before feeling that urge to die. If there's ever a fire and I have to run up and save Marjorie, I hope she's patient.

My new baby. This is her. Now stop looking at her, she's mine. In my excitement to get her home I forgot to buy a guitar strap or picks, so I'm playing tonight using the edge of a credit card. My fingers have lost all their callouses, so I'm all hurty.

Let's get out there and start sucking! I'm all set to play soccer on Sunday. Well, except that I have no cleats, clothes, or stamina, and haven't played in ten years, but beyond that I'm ready. I've watched a lot on TV lately, and it doesn't look that hard.

Had Turkish food last night. It was nummy. Ended up at a nice little Irish pub that actually has bar trivia once a month, sponsored by some children-with-special-needs organization. How perfect is that? The owner and his wife were really nice too.

Me and my shadow: Beau follows me everywhere in the house. I go to the kitchen, Beau comes along. I go upstairs, Beau follows me (even though he is not allowed upstairs and he knows it). I go to the bathroom, Beau tries to push his nose into the door to open it. He obviously missed me. It's really sweet, but makes me feel guilty for not being here and for leaving in a week...Maybe he can come to S'pore with me. What do you think Mark?
In remembrance of Bob my former employer who recently killed himself, I'll try to recall some stories about Rocky's, the restaurant I used to work at as a waitress. Here's a quick description: A swanky (or trying to be) pizza/pasta restaurant in Buckhead. There's a list when you come in of all the celebrities that have eaten here. Among the list are Pat Buchanan and John Gotti (this dichotomy is very Rocky's. Bob befriended, or at least kissed the asses of all famous people and there was definitely some Mafia connection). Others that visited the restaurant in the time I worked there are: Jerry Garcia, Laurence Fishburn (met him, rather nice), Sinbad, Toni Braxton, Madonna, Joe Fraiser (a regular), Eldrin Bell(chief of police at the time), Max Cleland, GA Senator (who is a shitty tipper BTW)....there were lots of celebrities in the place over the years and many politicians (I became jaded about politics largely because of Rocky's. There is definitely a connection between politics and the Mafia. If you don't believe it just look up Bob's criminal record which was somehow overlooked and underpunished by the politicians that befriended him again and again).
There were also always LOTS of drugs in the restaurant. Both managers were heavy coke users. Most pizza cooks and several of the waitstaff were potheads who would sneak outside behind the garbage bins at night to get stoned. Many of the staff also took nips of beer, Chianti, or homey wine during their shift (homey wine is cheap, really strong sangria-like wine the restaurant claimed was "home made" and served to guests with peaches. In actuality it was sold in screw top big old jugs like Boones Farm). I myself made a concoction of homey wine, sprite and pink lemonade on many occasions. Ironically, in spite of all the drug use, a lot of the kitchen staff were Muslim Moroccans who would take breaks during the day/night to pray. Many of these guys were perfectly nice, but some of them had serious issues with women and would constantly make advances on the waitresses.
And then there was Bob. Bob was also a coke addict (although I never saw him use it, just the effects). In the winter he would often stroll through the restaurant, chatting to guests, and pat at the guns in his gunbelt concealed under his jacket. On one particularly wild occasion after the restaurant had closed and all the staff had cleared out, Bob and one of his friends played "firing range" in the restaurant leaving several sweet little bullet holes that could then be seen above the smoking section booths and in the bathroom. The existence or raison d'etre for the holes was always denied, but they're there (still).
Bob was crazy, definitely, but not without some charm. He was always nice to me (although sometimes he scared me). And he wasn't stupid, he knew his life was bizarre and would make comments about it's soap opera-esque qualities he would refer to as "as the pizza turns". He had a good sense of humor and he generally treated his employees generously by feeding us most nights and letting us drink a free beer after shifts (while overlooking the stolen glasses of wine during the shift).
Many of the best friends I have in my life I met at Rocky's. The craziness of the place really somehow managed to create a (dysfunctional) family environment, which while totally insane, was really warm and fun a lot of the time. I'm going to see some other former employees this week. I'll pick their brains and see if I can come up with some of the better stories for you over the next week. There are sooo many stories to tell.

The Joys of Jet Lag. I'm back in Atlanta for a few days. After a very, very, very long and unpleasant flight, I've concluded (again) that United's economy class sucks. Japan air seems to be much better. I must really love my husband to be willing to get back on a plane and do the flight in reverse in a week.
I woke up at 2:00am this morning Atlanta time and called Mark. I then proceeded to take care of most of the tasks I'd planned for the day, so now at 7:40am, I'm feeling rather accomplished. I'm sure I'll pass out by 11:00am though, atleast hopefully I will so I can get in a good nap before Trivia this evening.
I've already gotten in some good puppy cuddling time with my parents' dogs, Beau and Sadie. I really miss them when I'm in S'pore. My dad refers to me as the "third puppy" which, honestly, is probably how Beau and Sadie see me. I'm not really an authority figure to them, just a pal that takes them out of the house to cool places like Piedmont Park and the Carter center where they can swim in stinky water and sniff lots of other doggys' butts. I also let them do lots of things they're not supposed to do, like come upstairs and sleep in a "people bed" with me.

Marjorie's home safe. I just a call from her. That's a load off. After thirty hours of flying, she might have to be threatened at gunpoint to get back on the plane again in ten days.

I stink right now. More than usual, I mean. Mildew is a big problem here, and the shirt I'm wearing today is getting more and more pungent as the day goes on. I just saw the repairman about fixing our dryer, so we hopefully won't have to hang things out to dry anymore, which is a big part of the problem.

Had some awesome dim sum for lunch today. I was a little trepidatious, since all I could remember from my last time having it (in Toronto) was eating lots and lots of tentacles. No tentacles this time, though I was saved at the last moment from accidentally ordering spicy chicken feet.

Sucking wind. Trying to get in shape for soccer. Tried to go for a jog last night, but got a cramp after about 500 meters (look at me, I'm Mr. Metric). Walked a little, jogged a little, walked a little... Got a second wind as I got back to our high rise, and tried to jog up the seventeen floors to our apartment. Could only make it up eleven. I feel like a fat tub of goo.

This takes me back. A more in-depth article on John Poindexter, who I used to work with. It even mentions the project I worked on with him (Genoa). Scary guy. But smart as all get out.

Back when I was working on this stuff, my roommates at the time cultivated their own image of what my job was. Their vision was like this: I stand out on the edge of a field, in a white lab coat, with a clipboard. Around me are a bunch of five-star generals and various military brass. In the middle of the field is a baby carriage. The whistle of a bomb dropping is heard. The baby carriage explodes. Everyone gives a golf clap and nods their approval at each other, as I jot down notes on my clipboard.

Not a terribly accurate job description, but it still kind of cracks me up. I'm quite glad not to be working in that industry anymore, though.

Google strikes again. Have you seen this? It appears that the mighty search engine Google is branching out into yet another searchable class of items -- namely, anything you might ever want to buy. You have to admire their chutzpah.

People have tried to make intelligent price-finding agents before, that automatically go out and find the cheapest price for something. They're usually met by resistance from the site owners who don't want their prices instantly compared to everybody else's. Google might have the clout to make it work this time.

There can be broad economic repercussions from this type of tool. Like, what chance does a store have if it's not selling something at the cheapest price to be found anywhere on the internet? Follow that to its logical end and someday every product might have a fixed price.

Hmmm, I looked again, and it doesn't actually do price comparisons. Maybe someday. Right now it's all about just finding the product you're looking for, which is still cool enough.

They need to branch this tool out a bit though, like the ability to filter for products that can actually be delivered to a given country. All the sites indexed by Froogle that I used to shop at won't deliver to Singapore. Sniff.

Beat the clock. I'm in the Hong Kong airport, trying to blog a few lines before getting (back) on a plane for 25 hours. I hate to fly inspite of my love for traveling. It literally hurts, I have to take sudafed and wear these funky ear plugs to keep my head from feeling like it's going to explode during every take off and landing.
I'm relatively fortunate today because they booked me in aisle seats the whole way, so at least I can go to the bathroom without disturbing anyone else.
Crazy about Bob, but like Mark alluded too, he lead a crazy life and this is not a surprising end. I'll have to write more about him when I have more time.
Wish me luck on the rest of my journey.

Marjorie's on her way back to Atlanta, to tie up loose ends and bring back some stuff. She should be on her way to Hong Kong right now; from there, on to San Francisco, then Atlanta. I don't envy her the 30 or so hours it'll take to get home. As for myself, to keep from getting lonely, tonight I'm going to go get a curvaceous new stand-in for her.

Marjorie's former boss killed himself last night, in dramatic fashion. I had met him a few times. I can't say I'm surprised -- not because he ever seemed depressed, but because Marjorie has relayed to me so many crazy stories about him (involving celebreties, the mafia, infidelities, etc.) that I had the feeling he wasn't going to die of old age. I'll let her clue you in.

Lousy stinking Eagles.

Earnest and Stupid This is a tag description I came up with awhile ago to describe the recipe for bad lyrics. Just think about it. Almost every Heavy Metal ballad (think "every rose has it's thorns") is earnest and stupid. Every boy band love song, the same. "Eternal Flame" by the Bangles, earnest and stupid. And yet, so many hits fall into this category. It really makes you wonder.
On a different note, we went to see "Full Frontal" tonight (the new Steven Soderbergh movie). It was....interesting. Not the best movie I've ever seen but it definitely gave us topics to discuss afterwards, which is what all good art should do -- provoke discussion.

Boring sports post. You have been warned.

In American football, my Eagles play their last game ever at Veteran's Stadium today. If they actually show it here (they've shown a few other games, but not all), it'll be at like 3 in the morning. I'm debating whether to get up. I never saw an Eagles game at the Vet, but I went to a few baseball games there as a child, and they are fond memories. I think the Phillies are still going to have their season there this year before they raze it. Anyway, go Eagles!

On to non-American football. We get a lot of English premier league coverage here. They even have a Manchester United store up the road (called Manchester United Kids!). Well, it seems that two players from Team USA are making their presence known out there. Brian McBride has had an awesome start while on loan to Everton for three months (three goals in two games, including an amazing bicycle kick goal). And Brad Friedel is being called the best keeper in the league, for Blackburn.

I've contacted some people via email and hopefully I'll be starting to play myself next week. I asked on the Expat Singapore discussion board if anyone knew of a league for out-of-shape windsuckers with deteriorated ball skills, and got a bite. I wonder how badly I'll stink up the field.

Giddy on good beer. We went out for German food tonight and I had a Paulaner Hefe-Weis Bier. Yum. Funny you can find better German food in Asia then in the States, but it seems to be so.
Afterwards we went to a bar and lost our Asian Karaoke virginity singing "All you need is love" (Mark), and "La Isle Bonita"(Me). We also met a fellow southern Expat, a gent named Lynn who we were able to chat with merrily about hawker centers, pedestrian life-style, and the joys of Tioman Island.
We are really enjoying living here. You all should definitely come and visit. S'pore's great. Really, and on so many different levels. I mean, how many other places can you spot a monkey while waiting for the bus?

Wildlife spotting. Today we took the bus up the road to Bukit Timah Nature Reserve. Cool new bird spotted for the life list: the greater racquet-tailed drongo. He let us walk right up under him. He seemed to be intentionally hanging out in the vicinity of a small squirrel; not sure what was going on there. Supposedly, there are pangolins there, which I would love to see, but they are rare and shy. There are supposed to be monkeys there, too, but we didn't see any -- that is, until we left the reserve and were waiting at the bus stop for the ride home. I looked back into the trees lining the road and spotted a long-tailed macaque. He poked his head out and let us get a good look at him.

I'm such a stinker. At one point while we were at the reserve, Marjorie said, "They have those flying snakes in Singapore, don't they." "Yeah," I said. (They do.) "Huh," she said. I could see she was thinking about them as we walked on. So a few seconds later, as I was walking behind her, I just touched her neck lightly. She about threw herself on the ground in reaction. She was ready to kill me.

In other news, you might remember I was debating whether to start taking language lessons in Cantonese (as is spoken by Chinese people in Hong Kong and the United States) or Mandarin (as is spoken by pretty much everyone else). Well, I've decided. I'm going to learn Japanese.

We had quite an eventful evening, in a low-key kind of way. We had dinner at Wala Wala Cafe in Holland Village. After a quick stop at the Haagen-Dazs afterwards, we were meandering to the taxi stand and spotted Kristen of Krisalis (I recognized her from her picture), a blog we've been reading for the better part of a year. We made quick introductions, met Kristen and her fiance Mark, and also met Andrea another blogosphere neighbor. Coolio. We then caught a cab and had the absolute BEST driver ever. Our driver asked where we were from (we said Atlanta) and then proceeded to tell us about his personal experience staying in the Travelodge in downtown Atlanta. He knew all about Peachtree Road having walked all the way from downtown to the Fox in an attempt to walk the entire length of Peachtree Rd. (not an easy feat). He was great. He then proceeded to tell us all about his travels through the U.S.A. The man has been to more places then I have. Really, puts me to shame. He'd been to the Grand Canyon, and Yosemite, and San Diego, and "to your poor cousin Mexico" as well. Hard to explain why, but in many ways this man exemplifies the charm of Singapore. We're so happy to be here, and are so utterly charmed with the people here. I'm sure we'll have many more stories to tell.......

A list of my top 20 movies can be found here. Having a Merchant/Ivory film as my #1 doesn't make me gay, does it? (Not that there's anything wrong with that).

We've got full power, Cap'n! At long last, I have my own power cord for my portable. I had to get one from Ebay, after five fruitless attempts to attain one through the Dell branch in S'pore. Those guys are utterly useless. It'll be nice to be able to surf without the Sword of Damocles battery indicator ticking down at the bottom of the screen.

Censorship We knew it happened here, but had yet to observe until yesterday. In less than an hour we experienced two acts of censorship: First, Mark observed that the article "a day in the life of a porn star" had been sliced out of the British Marie Claire I had purchased (interesting he noticed it, huh). Second, I was watching HBO waiting for Sex and The City to come on, it got up to the "and now the HBO original series Sex and The City" and then blip, some dumb movie with Alan Cumming. Looks like you were right Greg, no S&TC for me here. Altogether damned inconvenient but, we knew censorship happened here. Oh well.

I now know enough about what I'm working on that I can actually describe it.

If you've ever called technical support about anything, you'll notice that the tech support guys guide you through a series of questions. This series of questions is not something they have written down sequencially on a sheet of paper; too much depends on your answers to previous questions, and there's a wealth of possible outcomes. My friend out here has a startup company that plans on building software that helps the people who man those lines figure out what questions to ask, and what diagnoses to suggest, using an artificial intelligence technique.

The technique has a lot of broader applications, but technical support is a boom industry out here. Many times, when you call tech support from the States or Europe, your call ends up here.

To overuse an analogy, I've been drinking from the firehose since I started working. I've already learned heaps, and there's no end in sight. The hours are long, but I'm not forgetting I have a lovely new bride. Fortunately, she goes to sleep before I do, so I can spend the few hours after she goes to bed in the evening (that I used to spend jacking around) working. Like I should be doing now, I guess... Being "actualized" is a good thing.

Food update. Had lunch today at Mos Burger. As you can tell by the site, it's a Japanese chain. The menu, in English here in Singapore, starts with hamburgers and cheeseburgers, then gets progressively weirder. Eventually it gets down to a unagi burger (which is eel meat), where the bun isn't a bun, it's a sticky rice paddy. Yummy. I went with the plain hamburger.

Had a business dinner tonight at the BrauHaus, a German place, as you probably guessed. It's right up the road from us, and has the best beer selection I've yet seen in town. We had the mixed sausage plate, and the half pig-knuckle. Pig-knuckle is a first for me.

We saw the nastiest thing for sale in a wet market here last weekend; a pig face. The eyes, brains, hair, and skull were removed, and it just sat there on ice in the display case like a soggy mask.

I'm excited that there's a place right downstairs from my work that sells nothing but fresh fruit. I'm going to snack on fruit every day. Starting tomorrow. Today, I opted for the Mrs. Field's chocolate chip macadamia nut cookie.

Little things about Vietnam keep recirculating through my mind lately: An elderly women carrying her grown son on her back in Ho Chi Minh city. He must have had Cerebral Palsy, he was very emaciated and clearly paralyzed, she smiled weakly at me as we passed in a taxi;
Tiny little children yelling "Hello!" to Mark and myself as we wandered along a river in Hue, in an area where not many tourist venture;
The "man of the house" at our homestay in Sapa keeping us up singing that Jack Wagner hit "nothing's gonna change my love for you...";
Watching some Caucasian women on the beach in Hoi An surrounded by vendors trying to sell them stuff they didn't want or need, and feeling very grateful to be in the no harassment zone provided by our hotel. Then looking towards the opposite end of the beach at the Victoria hotel's Elephant "Darling" giving guests rides up and down the beach.
Seeing so many limbless people making their livings by begging in the streets of Ho Chi Minh.
Vietnam was tough, but I'm glad we went. I saw a travel show today with a guy in Cambodia, the Cambodians on the show had the same flat affect I saw on people in Vietnam, maybe an expression that comes from living through so many horrible things lik War, Genocide and Poverty. They went to a temple and the man said he was going to pray for the same thing all Cambodians pray for: "peace and prosperity".
Singapore is nothing like it's nearby neighbors. It's more like the U.S. in many respects than those places, but not so long ago they weren't so different. The Singaporean people have worked amazingly hard to create this incredibly modern and safe city. The striking differences really make me wonder, what is the difference between a modern "1st world" city, and a "3rd world" place? The difference between Hanoi, Ho Chi Minh, and Singapore makes some things easily identifiable in terms of what makes me feel more secure in a city, and makes a city seem more modern:
1. Construction site regulations and dust sheets to protect the surrounding areas from all of the dust created by the building site. There were no shields in Hanoi or much of Vietnam and the cities were dusty and overly polluted because of it (Ho Chi Minh seemed to be an exception).
2. Side walks should be kept open for pedestrians. In Vietnam, especially Hanoi, the sidewalks were primarily used to park motorbikes, forcing people to walk in the streets.
3. A central agency to regulate food sales, such as a board of health. No such entity appears to exist in Vietnam. In Singapore all food vendors are required to display their health/cleanliness rating, same as the U.S. and probably all other modern nations.
4. Clean water. This is crucial. How does a country provide clean drinking water for its populace? I don't know, but it's a requirement to be considered a modern metropolis (at least to me it is).
5. Child labour laws. We interacted with way too many very young kids out in the streets all over Vietnam selling things to help support their families. When do they play?
I'm sure more things like the preceding will occur to me later. It's just interesting to thing about these things, especially now that we live in a Country/City that's made the transition in the fairly recent past. What are the conditions necessary to become a modern city? I know some of these conditions would probably not be met by many places in the U.S.. It would make an interesting study. Can anyone tell I have my undergrad degree in Sociology? I love this stuff.

Little things -- evidence that we are not in Kansas anymore:

I can't imagine this happening in Atlanta. At lunch today, at a cafeteria-style place, a woman reserved her table -- by putting her keys on it. She wasn't back with her food for ten minutes.

Umbrellas are sold at a place nearby -- S$8 (about $5 US) when it's not raining, only S$6 when it is raining. Downright unAmerican.

Commercial breaks that only last one minute.

Bought a packet of hard salami. The calorie content was listed on the label under "Energy".

Yummy. I made Thai green curry with chicken for dinner tonight using the new recipe book I found. It was soooo yummy. It's so sad that this is the most exciting thing I have to report from the day, but.......
On other fronts, I've sent my past work information to the American Association here so hopefully they'll be able to link me to an agency that could use my volunteered time. I clearly need more to do here and an outlet to meet new people. Speaking of meeting people, I'm going to be in Atlanta next week. I'd love to see the old Posse.

Like, soooo interesting. This is so spot on. My niece Abi is now at the age where she recognizes things as sarcasm, but thinks it's sooooo stupid when you use it. The article neglects to mention how much fun it is to use anyway.

My first real day of work in the office where I'll be toiling away. Pretty cool. Right now they have me in the conference room, which is like a big private window office of my own. Too, it's on the 24th floor, looking directly east from here. Zoom out a bit to see where on the island this is. There's a view out over the shipping lane where boats line up (er, queue) to come into the port. On a clear day, there's a chance I might be able to see Indonesia. Though I doubt I'll be in the conference room for long; instead, it'll be a desk in one of those typing pool-type offices (lots of desks, no dividers). I hate that.

Not quite the day off I'd hoped for. Our planned excursion to Bukit Timah Nature Reserve was foiled by a late start and a rainstorm. The bird singing place was pretty much a bust, and the Monkey Temple that was supposed to be nearby seems to be gone. Too, the guitar shop where I planned on getting a new acoustic was closed. It's still a lot of fun to just tool around the city randomly though.

We just watched The Sixth Sense on TV -- Marjorie's first time, my second. As far as I could tell, it was completely unedited. I was worried that Marjorie was going to figure it all out before the end. She totally nailed the Munchausen-syndrome-by-proxy part before they revealed what was going on -- she always picks up on things like that before I do in movies. Luckily she didn't figure out the... other part.

We have a pet, sort of. There's a mynah that comes and sings to us everyday from the porch opposite ours. I occasionally go out there and tweet or whistle back at him/her and he/she responds by looking over and tweeting or squawking back. It's a great little interaction with nature.

One of the consequences of living here and having friends and family back in the states is that nearly all the blog comments, email, and discussion list postings we receive occur while we sleep. Mornings we check it all in one fell swoop.

In other words, all of our social interactions now come in digest form.

Life is unfair. We're ordering cable TV. I tell Marjorie I can do without the sports channels option -- even though I was addicted to watching soccer while we were in Vietnam (there's never any coverage in the US). She says, "Really? I'm getting HBO." (She's loves "Sex and the City".) So I say, "Okay, I'm getting the sports, then."

Cable has been installed. Turns out, HBO doesn't show "Sex and the City" here. Not hard to figure out why. Nor do they show "The Sopranos", or "Six Feet Under", it seems. Maybe it's just off-season.

But I get lots of soccer. And rugby. Mwu-ha-ha-ha-ha...

I guess I should be saying "football" instead of "soccer". We're gradually catching on to the Britishisms they use around here. I've successfully used the terms "taking the piss", "queue", and "lift", but "boot" (for "trunk") and "mate" (for "friend") still sound weird to me.

Surprised to see that a band I recently started to like is actually playing here in a couple of weeks -- Suede (aka the London Suede). Tickets are expensive (about $40 US), but the service fee is only a buck! I'm so used to bending over and taking it from TicketMaster in that regard...

Still setting up house. We went to Ikea last night. I'm glad to see Marjorie is not as in love with that place as she used to be (I've always referred to it as "Icky-Uh", which we've found is pretty much how Singaporeans pronounce it. They're a wise bunch). But it is convenient for some simple, cheap household purchases.

Today we get cable TV and cable modem. Currently our TV only gets some very wacky Asian channels. We do seem to get all the Bollywood we want, though.

Residency. We found an apartment, and have moved in. Our moving van was two taxicabs.

It's a smallish but nice place, quite near to some major shopping areas. We have a six month lease.

Are we officially ex-pats now? Maybe not until I get my work permit. We're working on that. My job so far has consisted of shopping for parts for the computer I'll be using, and assembling it. This is all work-at-home, so far; I haven't yet been in to the office where I'll be stationed.

We witnessed a rare Singapore occurrence last night: a crime. While in a taxi, we came across an accident, where a guy in a car knocked over a woman on a motorbike. They were arguing about it, and then the guy got angry and tried to karate kick the girl in the chest. Unfortunately he was about six inches too far away to actually make contact (I think he was drunk). Then he grabbed her jacket and tried to wrestle her to the ground. Our cab driver jumped out and helped another guy subdue him.

Shall we dance? You're walking along, through a crowd. Somebody coming the opposite direction has a trajectory that leads directly into you. You look up just before you run into each other, then start to move to one side, just as he moves to the same side. So you start to move the other way, again, just as he does. You smile at each other, and gesture with your eyes to one side, and finally, you move around each other.

It happens thousands of times in every life. The other day, though, I had that experience with a buddhist monk, in full robes, coming out of the subway.

Consider the lilies of the field. I start to work tomorrow. Why is it that a man should have to work? Aren't we the most advanced species on the planet? Why is it that only we toil away at jobs?

While we're at it, it's the 2000's. Aren't robots supposed to be doing all the work for us by now?